Wiser This Time *God Willing*

A friend once told me that for you to be able to forget someone you love, you must have a new love. Well, can this be true? Isn't it a rebound? It can't be in my case, since there was never a real relationship. Haha.

Last night, I had a get-together with my two sets of friends. Wow! I had so much fun. They are still awesome! They still make me laugh my head off and cry my eyes out. I had a roller coaster of emotions. We had lots of laugh trips, emo modes, and serious talks. Maybe I can talk about those on my next entry.

I had a weird feeling when I got home, and it was still odd when I woke up this morning. In almost three years, this is the first time that I did not think of him. Surprisingly, I am happy with that, so happy in fact. Now, I'm more certain that it's going to be for real this time. Now, there's another person in my mind, an old friend.

That old friend kept on asking me about what I learned in what I want to be called "past love." I just looked and smiled at him. I actually haven't thought about it yet. He was the one who answered his question. He said, next time, I should never assume and expect too much. I know, right? That sounds so familiar. That's what I've been hearing at the start of that "past love." I did try not to expect, but I just couldn't control it. That I guess is normal for people in love. Then again, real smart people have to know how to handle their feelings. Yes, and I have to be smarter this time.

Smarter. Wiser. Stronger. Lovelier. More Beautiful. Healthier. More loving. More sensitive. More God-centered. I am. No expectations. Mutual. REAL, hopefully, this time.

Good Vibes, I need you. NOW!

Sigh. Why am I so negative today? I'm feeling so low and somber. Maybe, I need a new environment. Maybe, I need to leave. Maybe I need to go somewhere far away from him, somewhere where I can completely move on and forget him, forget all about him. I just can't stand this anymore. The feeling keeps coming back. I really really want to move on already. Or maybe I need to talk to a psychologist or a psychiatrist. Good vibes, this is the time when I need you the most. Please! NOW!

Moody, I am!

Sometimes, I really do not understand myself. My mood swing last week was acceptable. Yes, because I had my period, but how about these past few days? I really do not get it. I've been thinking of a lot of things. I have to stop. NOW. I need to convince myself and believe that everything is going to be fine in the end. Yes. That should do because God is always there to help and guide me.

Funny Me

I just wanted to share what popped up in my mind! I just realized that my dreams are coming true already. I should be thankful. And I should continue to be patient, to keep on hoping, dreaming, believing, and praying. God does love me, that's for sure!

Serendipity or Coincidence

Earlier when I turned on the radio, the DJs were talking about serendipity and coincidence. Interesting, isn't it? It made me think. I mean, I do believe that everything happens for a reason, but does it mean that every single thing does? Well, I'm not so sure about that. The only thing I know is that so far, when I think about things, it seems that they do happen for a bigger purpose. It's like nothing really happens by accident. It may sound mushy, but when I look back, nothing has really been wasted. The cliche is true after all. I am what I am because of my past experiences. It boils down to my question. Earlier as well, the caller on the radio had the same problem as mine. She wasn't sure if her "friend" really likes her or what. What did the DJs advise her? "DO NOT ASSUME." That is also what my friends tell me. I know it's not healthy anymore, but it keeps on happening. Now, I'll tell myself that I won't assume anymore, and that I will try to forget what I'm feeling already. But what happens? I always eat what I say. Oh Good Lord, please help me. If every little thing really does happen for a reason, is it a sign for me to stop already? Whew! I need to help myself! Please guide me, Lord.